Wednesday, March 28, 2007

George King Embodies Everything That Is Wrong With Sports Journalism

When he's not making up fake trade rumors, he's making insane theories about which player is better than another, but only if you completely ignore any and all numbers you geeks.

Phelps has numbers; Phillips should get job

I can already taste the bile forming...
Josh Phelps has won the numbers battle with a better spring than Andy Phillips. But Phillips deserves to be Doug Mientkiewicz's backup at first.
Battles are not about numbers, people! Battles are about guts and intangibles and things that cannot be proven with any type of statistic! That's a battle!
For all the geeks who live in the black and white world of baseball, Josh Phillips has to be the Yankees’ backup first baseman over Andy Phillips. Yet, the choice here to play first when Joe Torre sits Doug Mientkiewicz is Phillips.
I'll translate that for you: for anyone who can look objectively at baseball, understands the game, and wishes to have their team comprised of the best possible players, Josh Phelps (yes, I see that George King doesn't even know one player from the other) has to be the Yankees' backup first baseman over Andy Phillips. Yet, for some soon to be described insane reason, I, George King, declare the better choice to be Andy Phillips. Do not look at numbers! If you do you are a geek! And you have poor eyesight ... and ... acne! I wonder if King knows one can use a "com-pew-ter" to read his articles.
Why? Doesn’t Phelps’ .438 average (14-for-32) with three homers and 10 RBIs this spring count for something? Yes and no. Fall in love with spring training numbers at your own risk. Nothing can be more hollow than March digits.
No, not "yes or no." Yes. Statistics do count for something. That was kind of the reason to have a roster competition. Otherwise the Yankees should have just said "fuck Spring Training!" and headed right for the Bronx with 25 guys and played exhibition games against the Newark Bears for as few weeks.
However, here is the real reason it should be Phillips over Phelps despite Phillips’ 190 (4-for-21) average after fanning four times Tuesday against the Twins: his swing is shorter than Phelps’ and that fits into a bench player better than Phelps’ long hack.
George King, complaining about hacks. Will irony never cease? King describes some very valid reasons for Phelps to make the team here, as Phillips has been downright awful this spring. But at least it's only spring, and those statistics don't matter, so we should instead look at Phillips' regular season results, right? Oh yes and also because his swing is shorter.

And there is more. No doubt Phillips’ 2005 season in which he batted .240 in 246 at-bats was a disappointment. Yet, his wife battled cancer all summer so that had to be on his mind. Phillips is a better fielding first baseman and has minor league experience at all infield positions.

Alright. George King already proved that he doesn't know which player is which. Now he compounds it by showing that he doesn't even know what year it is. Phillips only had 27 ABs in 2005. Those are 2006 stats, George. Also Friends is off the air, that's not the first Bush in the White House, you cannot buy a brand new Datsun, and man has developed the internal combustion engine. Hope that catches you up. Yes, Phillips is better defensively. However the Yankees already have a defensive first baseman who is not a good hitter. First base is the easiest position to defend and it's where you can stash the fielder who is just not good enough to play elsewhere in the infield. In addition the Yankees have Miguel Cairo (who also cannot hit) but can play all four infield positions.

Phelps has done everything asked of him and he can catch in an emergency. But that swing isn’t going to cut it against the Johan Santanas, Tom Glavines and Scott Kazmirs he is going to face after extended pine time.
Tom Glavine? This is still 2007, right? Phelps should be fearful of Tom Glavine? If Phelps looks silly against Santana, so be it. Everyone looks silly against Santana. But is he really worried about Scott Kazmir (who hasn't put it all together yet) or Tom Glavine? Wouldn't a "long" swing be better suited to a guy who throws a 35 mph heater?

The Yankees’ bench is better with Phillips than Phelps because spring training numbers have never been a true indicator of the real deal.
I'm George King and I just reiterated my premise without giving you any reason why it should be so! I don't have to because I write for the New York Post! Go screw yourselves, stat nerds!

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posted by Mr. Faded Glory @ 8:40 PM   6 comments


At 3/29/2007 4:54 PM, Blogger lupe! said...

jeez even i don't let my vagina tell me who should be on a roster. guess george king really really likes a pretty face.

At 3/29/2007 5:06 PM, Blogger Mr. Faded Glory said...

No, but I'm sure you at least let your vagina voice its opinion. :D

At 3/29/2007 7:39 PM, Blogger lupe! said...

oh, all the goddamn time. brain + heart + bellyful of guts are in a happy conspiracy to let it think it's got some say.

At 3/29/2007 8:04 PM, Blogger Mr. Faded Glory said...

your heart doesn't count unless it was transplanted from some sort of wild african animal, like a jaguar or lion or elephant

personally, i have wildebeast's heart

At 3/29/2007 10:02 PM, Blogger lupe! said...

i have the heart of an artichoke

At 3/31/2007 11:03 AM, Blogger Rex Banner said...

They both suck so who cares? There's a reason that Phelps couldn't crack the Tigers roster last year and we've seen what Phillips can do. Might as well give the hot hand a shot, although I have a feeling he'll be Craig Wilson v.2 (tons of K's, no D). Of course I know about that Wilson crush you have Mike.


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