Thursday, November 15, 2007

Let's Stop Making Insane Comparisons, Everyone

Peter Abraham reported that aliens are landing their UFOs in Central Park.

Now Wallace Matthews is going on about the following:

  • Ali G is about to be hired as a correspondent by "60 Minutes".
  • The Major League Baseball Players Association is about to abolish the DH
  • MLB is about to recommend the contraction of half the National League
  • MLB will ask players to pay for their own meals on the road and hand George Mitchell his reading glasses as he reads off the names of every player who can so much as spell H-G-H.

In proof of these theories, he offers the widely reported and believed story that Alex Rodriguez is negotiating a contract with the Yankees.

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